This site is dedicated to women who don’t meet patriarchal expectations of womanhood, including those who choose not to have children, and mothers who do anything that is criticized as being “unmotherly” (which is pretty much everyone).
You are so right that a mother such as this one harms your own children. I am entirely ok with walking away and did so.
For awhile everyone's shame was supposed to be mine, which is what happens in family patterns when parents can't hold a space for their children. I studied early childhood because my mother is/was an abusive alcoholic. She did it again when I divorced. My hanai mom calls it 'bewitched' though I find that most words do not work. Strong response to anyone harming your children is safe, and normal. Being an adult also means taking no shit from grown children either.
Completely agree. The shame can be difficult to shake but I think once you get a clear picture of the dysfunction, you can see it doesn't need to be your shame.
Now I want to read this book.
You are so right that a mother such as this one harms your own children. I am entirely ok with walking away and did so.
For awhile everyone's shame was supposed to be mine, which is what happens in family patterns when parents can't hold a space for their children. I studied early childhood because my mother is/was an abusive alcoholic. She did it again when I divorced. My hanai mom calls it 'bewitched' though I find that most words do not work. Strong response to anyone harming your children is safe, and normal. Being an adult also means taking no shit from grown children either.
Completely agree. The shame can be difficult to shake but I think once you get a clear picture of the dysfunction, you can see it doesn't need to be your shame.