Listen now | My central goal for the Bad Mothers podcast is to remove the guilt and shame many of us feel for creating boundaries with abusive parents.
This was a great episode. My siblings and I have had the exact same convo and similar experiences. There are three of us. I’m the eldest. Every other phone call my dad also expresses surprise and gratitude that we didn’t turn out “bad” or on drugs or or or. Phew. There’s so much. I used to imagine going to wherever my mom was and just standing at her door at her mercy-willing to agree with whatever—just to be mothered. Then I always realize that that is absolute insanity and I am tired of abandoning myself for transactional love.
Also, similar to Gina, having kids changed everything for me. I remember my mom started calling me disrespectful after I had my daughter. One day I asked her where that was coming from (as I worked very hard to be very good) and she said, “When you were younger you used to always agree with me.” SMH. Coincidentally, it was when my son was born and died that I realized I couldn’t do “it” anymore with her. She made me want to die and then it occurred to me..people aren’t supposed to make you WANT to die.
There’s so much! This episode made me think of all of it. We are all so resilient and deserving of the peace we’re fighting for. Bravo for a great intro episode.
This was a great episode. My siblings and I have had the exact same convo and similar experiences. There are three of us. I’m the eldest. Every other phone call my dad also expresses surprise and gratitude that we didn’t turn out “bad” or on drugs or or or. Phew. There’s so much. I used to imagine going to wherever my mom was and just standing at her door at her mercy-willing to agree with whatever—just to be mothered. Then I always realize that that is absolute insanity and I am tired of abandoning myself for transactional love.
Also, similar to Gina, having kids changed everything for me. I remember my mom started calling me disrespectful after I had my daughter. One day I asked her where that was coming from (as I worked very hard to be very good) and she said, “When you were younger you used to always agree with me.” SMH. Coincidentally, it was when my son was born and died that I realized I couldn’t do “it” anymore with her. She made me want to die and then it occurred to me..people aren’t supposed to make you WANT to die.
There’s so much! This episode made me think of all of it. We are all so resilient and deserving of the peace we’re fighting for. Bravo for a great intro episode.