I like your essay. I don't know anything about Patchett. I am a mother, but only discovered I wanted to be one on a day when I conceived, having said, want to have a baby.
Now, seeing how kids are leveraged, I have told both of them, it's up to you now. You are old enough to decide.
Society is really messed up about kids as well, as if there is some status for being a mother but only as long as you agree to the partnership...then you lose your kids if you say no way.
I like the treatment of motherhood as a job and decentering it as obligatory. But I'm curious about this quote: "Would it be fair to assume someone is going to be a ballet dancer or a Michelin star chef or a violinist? I imagine all of those jobs would be very difficult and very rewarding (of course not on the same scale as parenting, but stay with me)." You still maintain (as is the discursive norm) that parenting is more difficult and more rewarding than any other form of labor. That's a truth claim, not an objective fact, and one that mostly serves to reinstate motherhood as more rewarding than anything else. Seems to undermine what you're saying here.
Yes, I agree it’s a claim. I assume motherhood to be more difficult and more rewarding than anything else, but I don’t know it as a fact. I do think that even if we knew this to be a fact, it still would not mean that it’s for everybody. For me, I think even the rewards would not be enough to make it worthwhile. I want to do other things instead. I think both can be true, but that’s just my opinion.
I like your essay. I don't know anything about Patchett. I am a mother, but only discovered I wanted to be one on a day when I conceived, having said, want to have a baby.
Now, seeing how kids are leveraged, I have told both of them, it's up to you now. You are old enough to decide.
Society is really messed up about kids as well, as if there is some status for being a mother but only as long as you agree to the partnership...then you lose your kids if you say no way.
Patchett’s novels are wonderful. Highly recommend. Her most famous is Bel Canto, which was also made into a film.
thanks
I like the treatment of motherhood as a job and decentering it as obligatory. But I'm curious about this quote: "Would it be fair to assume someone is going to be a ballet dancer or a Michelin star chef or a violinist? I imagine all of those jobs would be very difficult and very rewarding (of course not on the same scale as parenting, but stay with me)." You still maintain (as is the discursive norm) that parenting is more difficult and more rewarding than any other form of labor. That's a truth claim, not an objective fact, and one that mostly serves to reinstate motherhood as more rewarding than anything else. Seems to undermine what you're saying here.
Yes, I agree it’s a claim. I assume motherhood to be more difficult and more rewarding than anything else, but I don’t know it as a fact. I do think that even if we knew this to be a fact, it still would not mean that it’s for everybody. For me, I think even the rewards would not be enough to make it worthwhile. I want to do other things instead. I think both can be true, but that’s just my opinion.