Shameful characters

I am not a psychologist. I am a writer. I may not be able to medically diagnose or treat certain behaviors, but I do need to make my characters make sense to readers. There needs to be a reason they do what they do. For example, we know that Nick Carraway in The Great Gatsby gives Gatsby and others every benefit of the doubt because of a lesson from his father (ideally the reasons a character does one thing or another are a little less overt than a page one explanation).

Maybe we have a male character who came from a very wealthy family, had everything handed to him, and was always told “yes,” so now he thinks that’s just normal. Maybe another came from a poor background and feels insecure in a new, powerful position. Maybe both of these men rely on bravado and “strength” to maintain a sense of entitlement and overcome feelings of insecurity, respectively.

I know these men. I’ve dated these men. And I can confirm that nine times out of ten, it is the job of everyone else to tiptoe around the landmines of their egos. Every woman in the world knows what I’m talking about.